Speaking of Newspapers

Jon Carroll on retention bonuses:

But real retention bonuses: What an idea! You get a job, and then your boss comes around and says, "Do you still want that job?" and you say "Yes" and he says, "Great, here's $100 million."

What a sweet idea. Plus, as I understand it, you could order an extra ficus for your office if you wanted one.

During those years, and I want to make this clear, I never received a retention bonus as such. There were no ficuses slipped under the table.